The Law Firm

This summer has really seen the proliferation of bizarre reality shows: from that ballroom dancing competition combining B TV “personalities” with real performers, to reform camps where we get to see brat kids toughing it out in the wilderness to learn about respect (yeah, like fending off a bear will drive a point about respect) or to learn about being a Hilton all through to going to college with Tommy Lee (coming soon). When confronted with previews for these shows, I often wonder, what will they come up with next?

Well, my question has been quickly answered last night. Somewhere in between all these weird concepts was the Law Firm. As soon as I came home yesterday, my brother told me about this Apprentice-like show with lawyers. “It’s so you! You have to watch it so that you know what you are getting yourself into”, he said. As in “so you!” he actually meant, being gung-ho about rules and procedure or that I am known to maul anyone that will try to oppose me.

I haven’t seen many episodes of the Apprentice, but during the few minutes I actually watched it, all I saw were self-conscious people bickering about stupid business ideas.

Anyhoo, the Law Firm turned out exactly as expected: a carbon copy of the Apprentice but in a legal setting. Change the title of President and CEO for Managing Partner, the stupid business ideas for ludicrous claims, all down to the trademarked “You’re fired!” to “I have made a decision”. It’s exactly the same, even the kind of people participating is the same! They had the nice girls, the full-of-themselves, the supposedly quiet type as well as the overly aggressive male b*tch, or the equivalent of the Apprentice’s Omorosa (heard she was pretty nasty).

In yesterday’s episode there were 2 cases presented to the would-be legal eagles:

1) A woman’s three-legged dog (I am NOT making this up) got mauled by her neighbour’s 2 menacing and massive dogs. She is suing her neighbour for damages or to get them put to sleep. The neighbour claims that it was her dog that ventured in his yard and that his dogs were adequately fenced in and the negligence was on her part.

2) A county coroner used his flashing lights to pull over a woman to warn her that she was speeding. Unlike a policeman, a coroner does not have the authority to stop people. Since she saw red and blue lights, she stopped and complied. After seeing him at a restaurant later and learned about his real position, she is suing him for impersonation that has caused her mental distress and anguish to the point she had to consult. The coroner, on the other hand, claims that he was only exercising his civic duty and wanted to protect her from a possible accident.

It was funny to see these suit-clad serious types working hard on defending the interest of a 3-legged dog. The team defending it even brought the dog to the courtroom! For both cases, they went through the whole weepy opening arguments to dramatic closing argument. In between, we were witness to many flare-ups, blow-ups and backstabbing among team members.

I work in a law department and a team approach is paramount. I guess that with $250,000 in play, team spirit is quickly forgotten. I am left to wonder: if these people were indeed very good lawyers, where success = $$$, why would they need to embarrass themselves in this contest? But then again, these are ambulance chasers… how much money can one make basing a career on defending (nut)cases like these?

Of course, this being a reality show, people need to get booted off; 2 of them did get kicked off and will now try to milk and stretch their 5 seconds of fame. So, look out for Kelly and another dude.

I must admit that it was just what it was supposed to be: entertaining. The Americans are good at that, being entertaining in all aspects of their society, even in the courtroom. After watching this, I guess that this gives any legal drama show freak the impression that they too can become a lawyer… Since this is from the same producers as Ally McBeal and L.A. Law…hum, maybe they simply just couldn’t afford actors…

Here’s a reality check: after seeing that show, it just confirms that I do not want to become a civil, criminal or any other form of people litigator. I don’t think I would have the patience to deal with that kind of bs. Unlike what my brother thinks, I doubt that my future workplace will be similar: contracts and business litigations rarely bring up that level of emotion...at least, I hope not!

I’m still alive… and p***ed off!

At last… an update! Yeah, it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything. You have to thank my new found e-friend, Diana, for this one. If it weren’t for her, it would probably have taken another looong while.

This past month has been rich in emotion and action. Between my computer breaking, the angst of turning 24 (and realising that I am now old!) and having to reconfigure my future, it has been a busy time that will require many posts to sort this out. First, here is the latest instalment of my Law School saga.

Rejected! (Part II)

From my last post, you know that I have been royally rejected by McGill and was still waiting for UdeM to give me the key to my future on a silver platter. From the title of this section, you probably already guessed what really happened.

On June 30th, date at which UdeM updated their website, I learned that, yet again, was deemed unworthy of studying Law. Needless to say that I was über devastated. At the precise moment I read “nous regrettons…”, I saw my whole future crumble before my eyes: Goodbye long and sleepless nights, goodbye hard exams and goodbye condo on Nun’s Island. Instead, all I pictured was nothingness, as if someone had pushed me off a cliff. It may sound exaggerated, but for a long while, going to study Law in Sept 2005 was the only option I considered and anything else was just impossible. Well, this was a pretty brutal wake-up call that forced me to come up with a Plan B, C, D all the way down to Z.

My colleagues, whom many are lawyers, were equally surprised of my rejection. Being a rooster, it kinda helped the ego a little.

The official reason of my painful rejection: this year’s number of applicants was just overwhelming and, unlike past years, all offers were accepted. Usually, people send applications for more than one school (me being one of them). However, there are some people, instead of making a choice, accept all offers and drop them at the very last minute when classes actually start. This leaves me, and all 55 other people on the waiting list, stranded.

It’s no consolation to be told: “If you applied last year, you would have gotten in”. Well, registration person, maybe I didn’t apply because… I was too busy actually finishing a useful degree!!

The shock soon turned into frustration when I learned that my computer marks were what really brought my evaluation down. I couldn’t believe that this error done while I was still young and foolish would still haunt me today. It doesn’t matter that I did rather well and honourably finished a bachelor degree in Finance, it doesn’t matter that I scored A’s in relevant commerce courses; it all came down to the fact that I can’t program in C++ nor assembly. Who knew that becoming a lawyer would actually involve hard-core programming knowledge? (I can say that in my workplace, it is really not the case!). Now, I really feel cheated.

In my usual ruckus causing style, I was soon enough firing a letter to the dean explaining to her how unjustly I was evaluated and that their faculty would be losing a valuable-member-full-of-potential-that-would-make-them-proud-and-put-them-on-the-map candidate by rejecting me. The letter was pretty harsh (I told them that their marks-only evaluation sucked, but in more diplomatic terms), but it sure made me feel better. Although I made them 25$ richer (yes, there was a fee associated with this procedure…why am I not surprised?), it still doesn’t buy me the guarantee of getting accepted this year.

In the meantime, I got accepted to the Certificate program in Law. That’s their watered-down version of the bachelor program (it’s 30 credits – equivalent to the 1st year of Law school) and a back door to the regular Law program. Since it’s part of Continued Ed, it’s all nite classes with mostly people of the working kind. That’s a plus for me, since I’m still in the studying mode and will be able to continue working. The minus: there will probably be many aspiring Law students that got rejected, like myself, and that also see this as the back door solution. What does this mean? Well, that I have to be at the very top of my class and pretty much ace everything. It’s going to be one hell of a competition, but hey, competition is part of this game.

I have decided to give myself another 2 tries at going to Law school and since they only admit people in the Fall, that means 2 years. Coming to this decision was not easy, it partly meant to postpone my dream. The present outcome of events was something that I did not foresee (rather, that I did not want to foresee) and accepting it is like taking cod-liver oil: hard to swallow. Not only are there implications for my professional life, but also in my personal (I’ll get to this at a later post).

At this point, all I can say is that it’s not over yet. Best case: the Dean realizes that the Registrars made an enormous boo-boo and grants me an acceptance letter via one of those village yellers (“Hear yee! Hear yee! UdeM hereby cordially invites you to humbly accept our VIP invitation to its Law Faculty.”). Worst case: they take my money and I am stuck with nite classes for the next 2 years. Ah… it ain’t over until the fat lady sings or in my case, the short girl yells.

Rejected!

Well, as the title of this post suggests, I got rejected… by McGill that is. It’s semi-official, I got a big fat refusal from that pretentious, euh… I mean prestigious, institution.

I’m saying semi-official because I found out by logging into my student account and saw “Refusal” as the decision. They didn’t even bother to send me a letter. If they did, I’m pretty sure it would sound like this:

“Dear wannabe student:

After reviewing your file, we regret to inform you that you suck and are unworthy of our attention. By accepting you, we’re loosing a spot that could have gone to a foreign student with lots of cash. Furthermore, your less than stellar academic record would have brought shame on our faculty; thus, we do not believe you will be able to contribute financially to our institution as an alumnus. Finally, but regretfully, we have already filled our ethnic quota.

We thank you for your interest in McGill, and non-refundable admission fee, and wish you the best of luck with your life…if you get one.

Yours truly,

Admissions MG

P.S.: If you still strive to be part of our venerable institution, we still have some spots left in sociology and other jobless subjects”

Ok… the wording would be much more diplomatic, but the underlying meaning, for me, would still remain the same.

Although it was a long shot, it still hurts to be rejected… especially that it’s my 2nd rejection from McGill: first, for Management and now for Law. Before you think that I’m some sort of a hopeless loser, for the record, I did get accepted in Computer Science there, BUT decided to go to ConU instead… (we all know how well that went!) It truly seems like a lifetime ago.

At the moment, I’m still on the waiting list at UdeM, and no word from them yet…

Stay tuned!

Summertime in Montreal

Summertime,
And the livin’ is easy
Fish are jumpin’
And the cotton is high

- Lyrics form George Gershwin’s “Summertime” -

Summer… a season all us Canadians are longing for… it’s the period when our igloos start to melt and that we can now move in our tepees. In Montreal, there are 2 seasons: freezing cold and suffocating hot. Spring and Fall are concepts we learn about in books at school, but in real life, there are no such thing.

Although I believe Gershwin’s song was written as a jazzy ode to the hard-working African-Americans in the cotton fields of the Southern states early last century, I still think it applies to summer here. Living is easier: no snow to shovel, no ice to scrape and the sidewalks are friendly again. Fish are jumping off the shelves as the hot weather calls for cool foods to eat (ie: sushi!) and the cotton [skirts] are getting higher and higher on the thigh.

That’s a sure sign of summer here. The minute you see the first micro-mini-can’t-sit skirt going down the street, summer’s here. Being a Montrealer, we usually start to shed layers of clothing as soon as the snow starts to melt. I’ve seen people in T-shirts and flip-flops when it was still only 10C…shivering, but desperately wanting to be the first to show some flesh… Now that it’s finally really warming up (up to 29C today), you can image the different stages of nakedness people are in.

With the layers of clothing shrinking away, I witness all sorts of things I wish I hadn’t. It’s like snow… when it melts, we discover surprises that should better remain hidden. In the snow example, dog poo and trash are the most common yucky unsightly things exposed with warm weather. With diminishing clothes, it’s a hanging belly, visible butt crack, overflowing lard handles and the likes.

I can already hear the love-thy-body-love-thy self advocates yelling at me: “A woman can dress as she likes and as she feels! Liberate your body! Every one should be allowed to wear a micro-mini-skirt, even if she weighs 400 pounds! No one is allowed to comment and guys cannot look!”

To those folks, I say pish-posh (I’m being polite)! I am a girl myself and I can’t stand the sight of a 3-sizes too small under-dressed woman that bulges out everywhere and then complains about being fat and unattractive. Whether you weigh 50 or 500 pounds, if clothing is 2 sizes too small, you will still end up looking like a sausage and feeling fat. Some days, I wonder what would motivate these people to dress that way. First, it must not be comfortable. Second, it does them no service and it is, to me, is a form of visual pollution.

I clearly recall a sighting where a girl, probably 14-16 years of age, average height, average weight. She was wearing the mandatory how-low-can-you-go jeans and a belly showing shirt…the typical North American teenager uniform, quoi. What’s wrong with this picture? Well, her belly was hanging OVER her pants in the front! Not bulging out, but hanging down… It was as if someone stuck some Playdough on the tummy and pulled it down. I am not one to judge, but what’s the idea behind that? I doubt that makes her feel good about herself… Where’s the comfort? Now that’s visual pollution! Won’t anybody think of the children?!

Montreal often boasts about being the city with the best looking girls. Well, some of them can actually pull off the barely-there look. However, when they do so, I hope that they are fully aware and expect to be looked at and drooled over when underdressed. If they have conscience of that, I have no problem… If they want to feel like objects, let them be. I’m all for freedom of choice and expression. It’s the false-modesty I can’t stand. If you want to flaunt it, do so, but do know that people will be staring at you.

Grand Prix coming to town next week… that’s when the best Eurotrash end up on our shores and with them, the start of the “Skankier than thou” contest…

So here, guys, a piece of advice: when the weather gets really hot and sticky, save a few bucks and go walk along the downtown streets (especially Friday and Saturday nites)… you’ll get an eyeful… for free!

(By the way, this observation applies for both guys and gals…)

The French Interlude

I know… It’s been quite a while since my last posting… For this delay, I blame my cousin Lan. She came over from Paris to spend 10 days with our Phamily to visit my ailing grandfather, to get a bit of R&R and of course, shopping!

I love having family over… All of a sudden, good food gets cooked and we’re actually allowed to eat it! We get a truce from the argument: ”Don’t touch it! It’s for guests only!”. During her stay, we indulged in a decadent foodfest: a welcome dinner with the whole Phamily, a mandatory brunch at the all-you-can-eat buffet, and the best, my uncle’s incomparable termidor lobster… As you can see in the picture below, I *cough* reluctantly obliged =P

Above: Lan and I eating Pinchy's relative

For every visiting European, one of the best activities to do in Montreal is shopping. Not willing to be the exception, Lan has also put this activity on the top of her list. Being gracious hosts, we took turns taking her shopping. Having lived here in the past, she had requested a visit to Winners. I also took her to the giant 3-floor La Senza and to my favourite store, the overpriced Lululemon in Westmount.

We stocked up on (lacy and racy, you wish!) unmentionables (thanks to a great sale at La Senza!) and she brought back a selection of Quaker oatmeal packets for her bf, including plain. I don’t really like oatmeal (especially plain oatmeal!), so for me, it was kind of amusing to see that this particular item was actually worthy of luggage space… Then again, I asked her to bring me some Chipsters, a popular kind of potato-flake snack (ie: Chips) that is not sold here…

After 2 solid days of succumbing to impulses of pure capitalist consumerism, I must say that I was pretty shopped out =P Can you imagine, me!? Getting tired of shopping?! Who thought this could ever happen? But, do not panic, I recovered quickly and can now be found strolling along St-Catherine Street daily…

Since all good things must end, we took her to Trudeau (the old Dorval) airport on Sunday and as I soon discovered, it’s the best place to see Quebec “stars” (I am using the term very loosely since they fly coach).

In line at the Air Transat (aka Air Sardines) counter for check-in, we saw Chantal Petitclerc (the award-winning wheelchair racer) and Stephanie Lapointe (that ordinary-looking gal that won Star Academie 2004 – She used to work at the petshop next to Wal Mart in Brossard). As we were standing in line, we were joking that she had a star filled flight and the only celebrity missing was Garou, her favourite Quebec singer.

Well, it almost came true… we were at the bookstore and who was behind us looking for a book? Garou! We couldn’t believe it! Being a very popular singer in Quebec and France, I was kinda surprised to see how well he blended in with us commoners, minding his own business. Nobody was harassing him and it was as if no one recognized him. I pride myself on the fact that, in Montreal, we respect other people’s spaces, celebrity or no celebrity… Let me rephrase that: we were too shy to ask him for a picture…

It was a packed 10 days of eating, spending and star gazing… Lan went back to Paris with her Quaker oatmeal and tons of underwear in her bigger-than-me suitcase as well as the sweet souvenir of a close encounter with the better-looking-in-person Garou…

Now that this interlude is over, it’s back to boring and harsh ordinary life and I am now on the “tomates et endives” diet to give my liver a break from the rich, and oh so delicious, foods we overstuffed ourselves with…

The Soothing Power of Rationalization

You must have noticed that I was pretty peeved by the waiting list issue... "Me, waiting list?! How dare they! Universities should beg to have me on their campuses! What do you mean my head doesn’t fit through the door anymore?!" Reality being what it is, waiting lists, as I have learned, are pretty common for restricted programs and being on one does not necessarily mean automatic failure.

In fact, being on a waiting list seems to be a rite of passage towards a better life, job and a pre-requisite to be part of society's elite. Last afternoon, I learned that my colleague’s legal career also started on a waiting list. Seeing where he is today gave me hope. If he did it, so can I! In turn, many years from now, I can see myself tell my kids or other ambitious and aspiring young-uns: “Don’t worry, my career also started on a waiting list… but no, you’ll never be as successful as me…”

As the best Law schools in Canada recruit the best and brightest candidates and as these people take their leisurely time to accept these offers, they will surely eventually turn down their spot at UdeM, as it is often considered a back-up school to McGill, UOttawa, UofT and the likes. So if enough bright people desert UdeM, there might still be a chance left for the not-so-bright and ordinary folk (i.e.: Me!)

Besides, there are worst waiting lists to be on: waiting lists to see a doctor, waiting lists for operations, waiting lists to get an organ transplant or worst… The waiting list to get that $5,000+ Birkin handbag by Hermes (which by now must have a wait time of over 18 months)!

I'll think of it as an initiation (a tamer version of the College/University ones: no alcohol nor weird contests involved)... If I survive it, I'm in...

Although this is was cheap rationalization exercise, it sure made me feel better… As that is what rationalization does best!

Let the Waiting Game Begin...

Waiting… we wait every single day… At the cash (especially in that express line at the supermarket), for the bathroom at home or in public places… My bf even waits patiently for me when I try some clothes when we go shopping (and I thank him for that!). Over the years, I’ve learned that there’s no point being in a hurry, we always end up waiting anyway =P

However, all this changed upon the receipt of a little piece of paper… I got a letter from the Université de Montréal yesterday informing me that I am on their waiting list for admission to Law. According to the UdeM, there are 55 other people in my situation and I am ranked 22 (category 15) on the list (whatever that means). From what I understand, I will be waiting some more (no answers before June 15th!)

Needless to say, I am rather upset at this turn of events: I was really looking forward to this new academic adventure. Ah yes… I was ready to dive into another 3-4 years of school, complete with sleepless nights spent studying, cramming for exams and the frustration that come with it, to fight for internships and other good stuff. As friends of mine are now embarking on their respective exciting career paths, whether it be a job stint in India, a promising financial analyst position at a big bank or a teaching position, I was ready to delay my entry into the working world to burry myself into books until I was green in the face.

I was already picturing myself: a short version of an Asian Ally McBeal (without the short skirts though, they don’t look good on me) or one of those aggressive types on [insert name of any TV show about lawyers here] minus the back-stabbing minds and sexual misconducts. People would be calling me “Maître” (translates to Master in English… hehe) and my idea of fun would be to spend hours and nights working over corporate governance issues, M&A and other exciting things related to corporate and securities law. I would be driving around in my crème coloured Mini and live in some condo on Ile-des-Soeurs. And no, I would never become a politician…

With me on this waiting list, it just feels that the possibility of Min-the-Mini-lawyer seems fainter. As I recall, I my school record at ConU was not stellar, but was far from being a gutter performance either. I did have a setback with me trying to study Computer Science… As a result, I still can’t install a program and call for help whenever my computer gets funny and now, I can’t get into Law! I feel like the abbreviation of Concordia holds true (Conned You!)

WARNING – THE FOLLOWING PASSAGE MAY BE OFFENSIVE FOR THOSE WHO ARE IN CEGEP OR ARE OR HAVE STUDIED ANTHROPOLOGY, SOCIOLOGY, POLITICAL SCIENCE, HISTORY AND ANY OTHER PSEUDO-SCIENCE PROGRAMs. IF YOU ARE STUDYING IN THESE FIELDS, PLEASE SKIP THE FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH

I guess I was put into a large pool with all other aspiring wide-eyed students from cegep and universities. In this pool, there is bound to have students that have made anthropology, history and political science their major. I’m sorry, but those classes are easy. Come on, how hard could it be to learn historical dates by heart? To interpret an event in the past? To write or do research about why men leave the toilet seat up (sociology and behavioural “science”)? If I would have gone into those fields, I would probably end up with really good grades… but no, I decided to study something useful and that could actually amount to a real job that pays real money. As for cegep students, I think that I have more credentials than an 18 year old and after having completed 93 real undergrad credits. I thought that having experience was good…What gives?

What angers me more is that this is UdeM… I wonder what it took to be accepted… GPA of 5.0? Code-R of 45? Other Gomery-Commission-type bribes? Who knows… At this point, I wish to get a positive answer from McGill and then send it along with a request for revision at UdeM... If this ever happens (which I kinda doubt), trust me, I will do it.

In the meantime, I can only do what I know how to do best: wait… Patience is a virtue and I guess that this is a good time for me really whow it...